Love After a Reluctant Date…
‘Wow’, was Ayesha’s first response when she saw Riyaad’s photograph after briefly seeing him at a wedding. I teased and asked, ‘Shall I arrange a date’, knowing that Riyaad is more than likely to decline the idea. He was more clear about his career than he was about a relationship with women. So when Ayesha affirmed with a nod that she would like to meet Riyaad, I was almost concerned at what his response may be.
I approached Riyaad and recommended a possible meeting with Ayesha. But I was correct in my concern as he had various reasons why he was not able to call her. He was shy and so I shared this with Ayesha with a dare for her to call him instead. The call was quick and painless with a movie date set for three nights later.
Riyaad who is to a large degree an introvert, surprised me when Ayesha shared, “He just wouldn’t stop talking throughout the movie. It was almost annoying!” Though Ayesha now playfully claims that Riyaad had stalked her since, they had become inseparable. Before long the sound of wedding bells echoed, but not before the decision to be coached as a couple. After two relationship coaching sessions, both Ayesha and Riyaad were clear about what could possibly become obstacles in their future. They jointly explored possible solutions in defusing future challenges. After a few more sessions they had explored their core values and understood the importance of each others Needs & Wants – Something which in many relationships are unfamiliar and almost never identified.
Four years and a new family member later, Ayesha and Riyaad had become one of our favourite couples. They are playful, quaint in their arguments, goal orientated and loving in an odd kind of way. They have done more than just surviving their relationship – they are consciously enjoying being in their relationship. They have deliberately chosen the kind of relationship they wish to have rather than what is expected in a conventional union.
They understand that marriage is like a business – without commitment and constant work, it will fail and shut down.